Additional report
By Jon Cooper

A big thank you to Dave Williams for organising a superb day at Dummer Golf Club near Basingstoke. Everything had been organised down to the last detail with coloured printed sheets of instructions for everyone. It soon became apparent that Dave has another interests running a close second to golf, and a quick peek at his midriff might give us a clue.

The day started at 7.45 (6.45 for Jini and Veronica) with copious cups of coffee and huge bacon baps. This was unfortunate as I had had breakfast before leaving but cleared my plate anyway. I was then in the first game out at 8.45 for a 9 hole team game.

The sun was up but the wind was fierce, about a 2.5 club wind I should think. When it was across the hole you really had to aim miles off. The course was OK, the fairways a bit dry and bare, making crisp shots tricky, especially with fairway woods. The greens were quick and all seemed to be dome shaped. Getting a shot to stay on the green was a real art and then reading the putts was incredibly hard for players who have pretty flat greens at home. I think the golfing term for the putts was a Salmon Rushdie (a pretty difficult read).

Anyhow, we chugged round in two hours and arrived back at the clubhouse to be greeted by a lady with huge plates of doorstep sarnies and bowls of chips. This, remember, about 2 hours after I had completed my second breakfast. Gurphal obviously comes from the Dave Williams school of nutrition and straight after this repast bought tea and 4 huge wedges of cake for our game "to keep our strength up".

I sat in the sun with a growling noise emanating from my stomach, feeling a little heavy and uncomfortable until it was time to tee off for the afternoon 18. My game in general had not improved that much but the cake did seem to have added a few yards to my drives. The afternoon round was a little slower (more people on the course, we were a little tired and the food had added several pounds to our body weight).

By the time I got back to the clubhouse (having three putted the 18th to cheers from the rest of Richmond Park on the veranda) it was about 5. I just had time to finish a drink when they called us through to a massive plate of steak and kidney pie, spuds and veg, followed by an even bigger bowl of apple crumble and custard, so sticky you could repair water pipes with it. Coffee (and chocolates of course) to round it off. It is several days later now and I am just beginning to feel a bit peckish.

The morning golf was won by Sheena Harrington’s team and in the afternoon the winner was Paul Grand with Arthur Dolby a close second. A great time – and 40,000 calories – was had by all.